On Saturday June 27th The Brooks headed to Salisbury NC to visit and celebrate Jonah King, Rays donor. We were able to collect 19 helmets to donate to the helmet drive that Jackie and Ken hold each year to donate to others in Jonah's memory. It was a great feeling to be able to take that many helmets and see Jackson and Riley unloading the bag with Ms. Jackie and looking at all the helmets and talking about them!
As we arrived and were getting out of the car, Ken (Jonah's dad) walked over to the car to greet us. This was my first time meeting Ken face to face, we had talked on the phone before. As we introduced we hugged one another- a long hug- a hug that I am sure we both felt our eyes fill up with tears and just hugged each other as if to say "it's ok". This is a moment and feeling you can never prepare yourself for on either end I am sure- the end of the family being the ones who received the gift or the end of the family who has lost their loved one. It is a strange feeling but at the same time a feeling of peace to be able to physically hug someone from that family and say "thank you".
I was able to meet so many friends and family members that Ray and the kids met last year (but I did not since I was unable to go). It was truly special! It was great to see Mrs. Jackie again (Jonah's mom, Malachi (Jonah's brother) and to meet in person Noah, Jonah's other brother.
Another highlight of the day for me was meeting Jonah's grandparents- Mr. Gene and Mrs. Barb King. I also briefly was able to meet Mrs. Jackie's father and stepmother but unfortunately we missed Jackie's mom- Mrs. Bernice....although I feel like I know her from Facebook!
It was a pleasure to sit down and chat with Mr. Gene and Mrs. Barb. One of the things they told me was that not long after Jonah's funeral, their daughter began to piece together what "they thought" was finding some of the organ recipients. They had found Ray and had found my blog, this blog during that time! Mr. Gene and Mrs. Barb said they would find themselves checking the blog daily, longing to get an update on how Ray was doing. My eyes filled with tears. It was really touching to me to know that through their pain, they were also pulling for this stranger that they "thought" could have received their precious grandson's liver. And maybe in some small, strange way that provided them with a sense of hope during those first weeks of loss.
It was also really touching just to hear Mr. Gene talk about his grandson. How strong and stubborn he was; I was able to tell him THANK GOODNESS for that characteristic because I am convinced that, that strong, stubborn characteristic is what helped Jonah's liver last as long as it did so that Rays surgery could happen and be complete. Just hearing this sweet man talk of his grandson reminded me too of my sweet Granddaddy Joe. As Mr. Gene would talk of Jonah or relive a story you could see his eyes fill with tears and it just made me think of how my own sweet Granddaddy would feel if he too like Mr. Gene would have outlived one of his grandkids. As happy and thankful as this family is to meet and form relationships with these recipient families it is also obvious that they still miss their Jonah and the hurt is still there. I am amazed with how they all pick up, move on and continue to live life not in spite of it all but FOR Jonah.
This was also a special day because the Kings were getting to meet another transplant recipient- John from Maine that received Jonah's lungs.They have now met 3 recipients and also heard from a few others. I remembered back to a little over a year ago and how I felt meeting Mrs. Jackie for the first time. Being able to hug her and talk to her in person. As I watched John and his wife walk up and Mrs. Jackie and Ken go out to greet them and embrace each other for the first time...it was special to be able to see that happen from the outside looking in. John and Ray enjoyed talking- sharing transplant stories, their "battle scars", what medication they both took, etc...I am sure it is an overwhelming feeling for these two strangers to have been able to meet knowing that they both have a piece of a special angel that helped them to continue to live.
I am reminded on days like Saturday how blessed my family is. It fills you with a sense of happiness and also a sense of remembering that "this could have turned out so differently" had Jonah not been a donor. That God doesn't give us more than we can handle- even when it doesn't feel like it- he doesn't- that rings true with this special family- The Kings.
Thank you to all those who helped by making a donation to the helmet drive or by giving a cash donation for the Brooks' to buy helmets. I am certain that it will make a difference and keep kids safe!
*Recently I asked a girlfriend of mine to send me a document of the night she was with Ray at the FD when he got "the call" for the transplant. I want to use it in my book I am writing. I ask our friends and family- if there is something that sticks out in your minds from either the first or second transplant, please jot it down and type it in a word document and send it to me. I would love to get others perspectives and memories to add as a supplement to the book.
Thanks everyone,
Ray and Janet
